The Hundredth Man
by Tokki-chan
Summary: Written for my site\'s anniversary. Slayers take on modern day relationships.


The Hundredth Man 

The Hundredth Man 

Author's Notes: Don't own Slayers. Fused with a Korean movie by the same title. Only vaguely remembered the plot, but made up the rest as I went along. Hope it turned out okay! 

"And so, ladies of Chicago, I urge you to reconsider exactly what you're doing with your life. Take a long look in the mirror tonight and say, `I'm beautiful, I'm smart, I deserve better.' Because believe me, you do. This is Lina Inverse, wishing you all a good night." 

As soon as Zelgadis gave the cue, the ON AIR sign blinked off. Lina breathed a sigh of relief and yanked off the headsets. "Another day, another dollar," she muttered, hanging them on the dead microphone. 

Zelgadis quickly shut down the machines in the booth with careless flips of the switches. "Another good show, O Femme Fatale." 

Lina gave her producer a look. Zelgadis smirked and grabbed their coats from the pegs on the wall. And while he helped her into her coat, he couldn't help but add, "I wouldn't be surprised if the divorce rate in this country shot up by tomorrow morning." 

"Har har." But there was a certain measure of truth behind those words meant in jest. It had been on her mind a lot lately. "Zel, do you think I'm going overboard?" 

Zelgadis stopped halfway through one sleeve just long enough to give Lina a decidedly confused blink. "Overboard? With what?" 

"Oh, you know. With the whole `feminist' thing," she said, emphasizing the "f-word" with finger quotation marks. 

"Well," he said, as they walked through the door and down the hall to the coffee machine, "you're doing what you've always been doing all this time." 

"I know," she sighed as he handed her a cup of coffee. Instant. Blech. "But lately I guess I've been getting sick of it." 

Zelgadis frowned. "If you want to change your act, it's up to you. But this `femme-nazi' routine has been what you've been capitalizing your fame on." 

"I know," she said quietly, swirling the stale brown fluid around in the tiny Styrofoam cup. It's true. This routine had been very good to her. At first it had been all about the Cause, when Lina was younger and truly believed in something. Then the novelty of the fervor had worn off, but by that time she had become the highest rated radio personality in the greater Chicago area. It never occurred to her to quit…until recently. 

Lina downed the rest of the coffee and tossed the cup. She turned back to her producer, but realized he was no longer paying attention. She followed his line of sight and saw the pretty young intern, hired just last week. A sweet enough girl with that real enthusiasm for her job that always comes with youth and ignorance. What was her name? Emily? Amanda? Something like that. Lina hadn't bothered; she probably wouldn't last very long anyway. 

Lina smirked and shook her head. "Incredible. You sit there everyday listening to me talk, and not a word goes to your head. So, is she the prey this week?" 

"Oh, yeah," he said without tearing his eyes away from her. "She might be The One." 

Lina arched an eyebrow. "You got all of that from her bust size? I'm impressed." 

He laughed congenially. "I'm serious." An idea seemed to pop into his head because suddenly he felt it was time to actually face Lina. "Hey, maybe this is what you need." 

"Sorry, I don't swing that way." 

"No, baka. When was the last time you had a date?" 

"Not interested." 

"Oh, come on. What's the big deal? You could stand to have a life outside of work anyway. Do you even remember what a date feels like?" 

"And do what? Waste his money? Jump into the sack? No, thanks. I don't need to add `hypocrite' to my long list of nicknames." 

"You might as well. You practically are one anyway." He got a glare in thanks for his comment. "Oh, come off of it. You stopped believing in that babble a long time ago." 

"And you're not helping." 

"Hey, I'm your producer. My extent of dealing with your philosophy is getting it out there so listeners can eat it up and our ratings go up. Otherwise, it's strictly business, and there's always time for pleasure." 

She gave an exasperated breath through her teeth. "You're incorrigible." 

He smirked. "And loving it, baby. But seriously, Lina. You oughta get out more. Think about what I said. It could do wonders." So saying, he handed his coffee cup over and sauntered over towards the pretty brunette. 

Lina downed the rest of the coffee before she realized he had schlepped off his cup to her again. Taking it was like second nature now. Crumpling the cup in one hand, she tossed it over her shoulder and headed home. 

"Slyphiel?" 

Why had she even bothered calling? The dark of the room should have made it blatantly clear that her roommate wasn't home yet. Sighing for the umpteenth time today (she seemed to be doing that a lot lately) she pulled off her shoes, throwing them carelessly on the floor, switched on the lights and headed towards the kitchen to fix dinner. 

Five minutes later, the microwave announced that dinner was done, and Lina stuck the plastic fork into the mac' n cheese. She didn't bother turning on the television. There was nothing to watch anymore. So she turned to what had started to occupy most of her time these days: stargazing. The large telescope she bought last month was set up by the apartment's largest window, aimed skyward. For some reason, those millions of tiny white dots in a clear black sky were about the only thing that could calm her down. It was grounding to be reminded that despite all her problems and frustrations, in the large scheme of things, she was just a small part of the universe. 

But no such luck tonight. The skies were clouded over, not a star in sight. Lina bit down on the fork in frustration and lowered the telescope and was about to pull away when something caught her eye. In the apartment right across from her, the one that had been vacant since last year, she saw something move. On closer inspection, she could make out the form of a person. A tall man with long blond hair, scratch that, a really cute guy with long hair and the height to match was lugging a box in his arms and he glanced around as though he were searching for the perfect place to put it down. He chose the spot of ground right behind him, and bent over to put it down… The fork clattered to the ground. 

The man righted himself (which Lina felt with a twinge of disappointment) and wiped his brow. Apparently he had been moving in all day. At any rate, he chose that moment to pull his shirt over his head and give Lina an eyeful of a very toned physique… 

"Lina, I'm home!" followed by a door slam. 

Lina's heart nearly burst out of her chest and she jumped a foot in the air. She spun around, guiltily trying to hide the telescope behind her, her breath coming up short for more than one reason and tried to fight the bright red blush apparent all over her face. Slyphiel noticed her roommate's odd appearance and asked, "Is something wrong? Are you sick?" 

"Eh heheheheheh, no no not at all," Lina stammered nervously. Slyphiel was still giving her an odd look so she changed the subject. "So, how was work? Did you get the cover?" 

Slyphiel let out a frustrated growl. "No. I missed the cover shot AGAIN! I swear, that bitch Camilla must be sleeping around or something because I don't understand how she can always get on the cover. I mean, I'm prettier than she is, and I'm taller—" Lina pretended to listen, looking very sympathetic and nodding at what she hoped were appropriate places while she regained her composure and inwardly sighed in relief. Crisis adverted. 

"Oh, Lina! You aren't eating TV dinners again, are you?" Lina looked guilty but couldn't deny it. "Honestly, those things are so unhealthy! Just wait a minute and I'll whip something up," Slyphiel said, digging through the fridge and pulling out random items. Lina had to admit, even if Slyphiel was an underrated model, she was a great chef. 

"So," Lina said, when they finally sat down to a substantial dinner, "did you get into an argument with the photographer or something? Is that why you're home so late?" 

"No," Slyphiel said sighing again, this time tragically. "I had a date tonight." 

"Didn't go so well, I take it." 

"No. I swear, just because you're pretty men think you're automatically a bimbo and a slut. You're so lucky you don't have to worry about this." 

"Thanks, I think," Lina said sarcastically, trying not to be too offended by that. 

"Oh! I didn't mean it that way! I mean, you don't date at all. You're smart that way. I would do that, too, but I need to date, you know." 

"Well, maybe you'll find someone next time." 

"I better. I'm reaching the end." 

"End? Of dating?" 

Slyphiel nodded. "I'm almost to the hundredth man." At seeing her roommate's confused expression, she continued to explain, "You date up to a hundred guys. If you haven't met The One by the hundredth man, there's no one for you. Standard rule of dating." 

Lina gave her an incredulous look. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." 

"No, no! It makes sense. Think about it: if out of a hundred guys in this entire world you haven't found the right one for you, there's probably no one alive who can satisfy you." 

"I guess," she conceded, still doubtful. 

"But, hey!" Slyphiel said, suddenly excited. "Maybe I can go up to two hundred! You're not using your quota, are you?" 

"Slyphiel!" 

"Ha, ha. Kidding, kidding," she said congenially, turning back to the vegetables. But she couldn't help but add, "But seriously, Lina, do you even remember what a guy looks like?" 

Lina sighed in frustration. "Not you, too. What is this, Hook Lina Up Day?" 

"Seriously, you ought to get your feet wet a little, you know? Do you really want to end up alone?" 

Alone? The word stunned Lina into silence. She hadn't thought of it that way. An empty apartment day after day? Even when she was old and gray? No one…. Alone… "…No." 

The next morning, Lina pounded through the living room, desperately searching for her shoes. "How did this happen?" she whined. "Why didn't the alarm go off?" 

"I think we need new batteries," Slyphiel said breathlessly, pulling her jacket on while trying to pull up her stockings. "Come on, let's go!" They both ran out the front door at the same time. 

The two ladies pounded through the parking lot towards Lina's car at the other end. Lina, naturally faster and not in heels, was of course several feet ahead of Slyphiel. With thoughts of pink slips dancing in her head, she failed to notice the car backing out until Slyphiel's piercing scream pulled her back to reality. Lina grunted against the impact of the car that sent her sprawling to the ground. 

After the shock of impact wore off, Lina was thankful to realize that she wasn't dead or even broken in any way, though her jeans did have a nasty hole in it. She started to sit up, and Slyphiel was instantly at her side helping her, all the while glaring at the offending car. 

The car, to its credit, stopped immediately and the frantic driver popped out, anxiously asking if Lina was all right and if she wanted a doctor. 

"Of course she isn't all right!" Slyphiel snapped. "Where the hell did you learn to drive anyway? Don't you know to always look and check for pedestrians?" 

While the man bent his head to Slyphiel's scolding, all the while murmuring mournful apologies, Lina finally got a look at her offender and gasped. It was him! That guy in the apartment across the street from last night! And damn if he wasn't a whole lot cuter in person. 

With Slyphiel's help, Lina managed to stagger to her feet, but nothing could help with the butterflies in her stomach. 

"Are you sure you're going to be fine?" the man asked Lina worriedly. 

Without making eye contact, Lina murmured, "Yes, I'm fine." But was overridden by Slyphiel's more belligerent "No thanks to you! I hope you have a good lawyer because you're going to need one!" 

"C'mon, Slyphiel, let's go," Lina pleaded, tugging on her arm. "He said he was sorry." She didn't want a scene, especially involving this man. Not to mention, she was late. 

"How can you say that, Lina? He nearly killed you!" 

"He did not, and it's no big deal right now. Sorry, sir," she said hurriedly bobbing her head to the man while quickly getting out of there as fast as she could, Slyphiel in tow. 

Zelgadis' ears perked when he heard the opening door finally announce Lina's arrival. He glanced at his watch. "You're twenty minutes late," he said. "If you needed a ride, you should've called me…. What happened to you?" 

"Nice of you to finally notice." 

"No, seriously, what happened?" 

"Nothing," she huffed, sitting down in a chair. "A little accident, that's all." 

"My God. Are you going to be okay? Do you want to take the day off?" 

"I'm fine, Zel! Really! So, what's on the schedule today?" 

Zelgadis gave her a long look, but decided to leave it at that and returned to the script for tomorrow evening's show when the young intern from last night showed up with their coffees and didn't leave until she placed a very cute peck on Zelgadis' cheek. 

Lina smirked. "I see you don't waste any time." 

"Yeah, well," he said, smiling in spite of himself. 

"So…" 

"So?" 

"Zel! What's her name? Is she nice? Is she The One? C'mon, I'm dying to know!" 

Zelgadis laughed. "So obsessed over others' love lives but none of your own. What is the world coming to?" He laughed again at Lina's pout and decided to concede. "Her name is Amelia. Her father actually runs this station, and yes she's very nice and sweet. As to whether she is The One, she just might be, Lina. I don't know, but I've got this feeling, you know?" 

"No way, her father is Sailune? Wow, Zel, you've bagged one rich chick. If things work out, you might own this station in a few years." Egged on by his amused laughter, she decided to continue, "If that's the case, you won't forget about your precious Lina, will you?" 

"Ha ha, I get it. Only then will you acknowledge any attachments to Zelgadis Graywords." 

"You betcha. So, did you do her yet?" She laughed as she watched her producer spill hot coffee all over himself. "It was a joke!" 

"Har har," he muttered as he dabbed the brown stain. The scorching fluid was cooling, but his red face was not. "So," he said, changing the subject, "have you thought about what I said?" Surprisingly, she didn't make some snide comeback and instead kept the guilty silence. "No way," he said in utter disbelief. 

"What!?" Was it that hard to imagine her being with someone?"When did this happen?" 

"Well, last night…I guess…" 

"You guess? Either it did or it didn't. What's his name?" 

Uh oh. Pick up the script! "Uh, Zel, I think this line has to be revised and this line—" 

"Oh, no you don't," he said, forcing the script out of her hand. "You're not getting out of this. What's this guy's name?" 

Bright red Lina. Yeah, red was a good color for her. "I- I don't know." 

Zelgadis facefaulted. "You don't know?" 

"We never officially met, okay?" 

Zelgadis sighed. "Ah, Lina, Lina. Whatever shall we do with you?" He blinked, and suddenly bent closer to Lina's face. "But before that, what are you going to do with that tooth?" 

"Huh?" 

"Your tooth," he said, pointing. "It's chipped." 

Lina instantly felt around her mouth, first with her tongue, then with her fingers to verify. No doubt about it. 

"Great. Just great." 

This wasn't the dentist Lina was used to going to, but it was the closest one to the station. She was, after all, still technically working. But Zelgadis had said he'd cover for her so here she was. The shininess of the brass lettering on the door indicated it was a fairly new office. Well, she didn't care how young the practitioner was as long as they took her insurance. 

Lina stepped into the tiny waiting room. Along with the familiar medicinal smell of dentist offices was the familiar sight of oddly upholstered modern chairs, a small table with dated magazines and posters encouraging people to brush. It was empty, save for the lone blonde receptionist behind the counter, who was apparently talking to her boyfriend on the phone. 

"How much do you love me? Aw, honey. I miss you too!" 

"Um, excuse me." 

"Hold on a second, hon," the receptionist said. She gave Lina an annoyed look that clearly said How-dare-you-interrupt-my-important-life-to-serve-your-menial-one. "Can I help you?" 

"Yes," Lina said with as much acid in her voice that said This-is-your-job-bitch-like-it-or-not. "I'm a new patient here, and…" 

The receptionist sighed and gave her a form to fill out while she ran her insurance card through, all the while never hanging up the phone so she could continue to coo at her boyfriend. 

After what seemed like an eternity, the receptionist finally turned back to Lina and said in a bored voice, "I'm sorry, your insurance isn't valid here." 

"What? Why not?" 

"I don't know," the receptionist said irritably, offended that Lina was even asking something as stupid and obvious as this, "but it's not being accepted." 

"Now, listen here, you—" Lina started as soon as another voice from the other room called "Filia, what's the hassle?" 

"Oh, nothing, doctor. We're just having a problem with this patient's insurance policy." 

"Insurance problems, huh?" the dentist said, sauntering into the room. Lina tried to stop for the second time today the gasp of surprise from bursting out but it was impossible. Once again, he was the one who showed up. 

Likewise, he seemed to remember her, too. His face lit up in recognition. "Hey, aren't you the one from this morning?' 

"Y-yeah." 

"Small world. Hey, I'm really sorry about that. I guess I wasn't paying attention," he said sheepishly. "I'm such a moron sometimes." 

"No, no it was nothing," she said quickly, trying not to blush. Handsome, courteous, and a dentist, huh? Something in her subconscious prodded her. 

"So, what are you here for?" 

"I just…" she pointed to her chipped tooth. 

He squinted and took a good look at the tooth. Then he smiled warmly. "Well, come on in and we'll see what we can do with it." 

Minutes later, Lina was reclined in the dentist chair, mouth wide open with operation lights glaring overhead. The dentist poked around for a short while before informing her cheerfully, "Yup, we can cover this right up." 

"Thanks," Lina said. Or rather wanted to say, but with all that stuff in her mouth it sounded more like "Rnnks." The procedure took about twenty minutes, but afterwards, when he showed her smile in a mirror, it was like nothing had happened. She turned her now complete smile to him and said, "Thanks, you did a great job!" Then she frowned. "But I'm afraid my insurance isn't working here so…." 

But he would have none of it. "Please, it's on the house." 

"But I couldn't possibly!" 

He waved all her protests away. "Nonsense. This is the least I could do after this morning." 

And generous. "Thank you Mr…" 

"Gabriev. But please, call me Gourry. And you are?" 

"Lina Inverse." 

"Well, Miss Inverse, I hope to see you again soon." Lina wanted to melt right then and there. 

That night found Lina at the window again, wistfully gazing through the telescope at the other apartment. She watched him now happily settled in as he watched TV, eating take-out pizza, and then feeding his pet parakeet. 

"What are you doing?" a voice said at her ear. 

"I'm watching—ACK! Slyphiel! What are you doing here?" 

"I live here." 

"I know that!" she snapped. "I didn't hear you come in." 

Slyphiel smirked, much to Lina's chagrin. "Maybe you would have if you weren't drooling over some guy, you peeping tom. And here I thought you bought that boring ol' thing for science. Way to go, Lina!" 

"It's not like that!" 

"Oh, come on, I know what I saw. So," she said excitedly, pushing Lina out of the way and looking through the lens herself, "let's see what Lina's taste is." Slyphiel blinked in surprise and tried cleaning the lens to make sure she wasn't seeing things. "It's that guy from this morning!" 

"Yeah…" 

"Lina, that's sick! He tried to kill you!" 

"He did not! That was an accident. I actually met him today. He's nice and handsome and generous and courteous. He really helped me out." 

"Oh, really? Where did you meet this Wonder Boy? Before or after the hit and run?" 

"For the last time, Slyph! It WASN'T a hit and run! He was really sorry about it. He even fixed my tooth for free." 

"Yeah, well, he's probably the one that broke it in the first place. Wait, did you say fix your tooth?" 

"Yeah. He's a dentist." 

"He's a dentist?" 

"And a good one at that." 

"A dentist?" 

"So?" 

"Is he single?" 

"Slyphiel!" 

"Just wondering…" she said, going back to the telescope. Now she really wanted a good look at this guy. 

The next morning found Slyphiel behind a shopping cart. At the market again. She still couldn't believe how much Lina actually managed to put away. Grimly, she picked out some heads of lettuce before starting to turn down the next isle. Before she could, however, she screeched to a halt. There, picking out some instant cake mix, was the dentist they were spying on last night. And yes, now that she got a good look at him, he was cute. Slyphiel cautiously made her way down the isle, and right when she passed him, discreetly dropped her purse while continuing on looking as though she hadn't noticed. 

She hadn't gone five steps before she heard, "Excuse me, Miss?" 

Slyphiel smiled. Bingo! Preparing an appropriately confused face while managing to smile gently, she turned around and faced him. "Yes?" 

Gourry's jaw hit the floor and he nearly dropped the purse he picked up. "Hey, aren't you-?" 

Slyphiel feigned shock. "Oh, my! You're the one from the parking lot!" 

Gourry smiled. "You remembered. Look, I'm really sorry about that time." 

Slyphiel waved her hand. "No, no. I overreacted. I was just worried about my roommate, that's all. But she's okay." 

Gourry nodded understandingly. "Yeah, I know. She came by the office the other day." There was an awkward silence. 

Finally, Slyphiel decided to break it. "The office?" she prompted. 

"Oh! Yeah, I'm a dentist," he said, laughing nervously. 

"Oh, really? How's business?" 

"Pretty good, actually," Gourry grinned. This girl was so pretty! And nice once she wasn't yelling at him. Why were they talking again? "Considering I've just moved my practice, I've got a lot of patients." 

"That's great," Slyphiel said sincerely. Then she looked pointedly at his hands and asked politely, "Is that my purse?" 

"Oh!" Gourry hurriedly handed it back to her, much to Slyphiel's amusement. He was sweet. "Uh, I didn't steal or anything," he said quickly, getting red in the face. "I just saw it, I mean, found it on the ground. I, er, think you dropped it?" 

"Thank you," she said, gratefully. Thank you for not being a jerk. "I wish I could do something for you in return." 

"No, that's not necessary." 

"But I insist," she said firmly. Glancing at his cart, she asked, "Instant ramen? That's no meal. How `bout I fix you dinner tonight?" 

Gourry couldn't believe what he just heard. "Are you sure about this?" 

Slyphiel smiled warmly. "Of course. It'll be no problem at all." 

Lina could not believe what she was seeing. She was so surprised she dropped the plastic food tray. "I don't believe this!" she fumed, but unable to tear her eyes away from what was going on across the street from her. 

Oh, yes, Slyphiel and she were going to have a talk. 

Slyphiel felt the heaviness in the air the instant she walked into the apartment. Lina was sitting on the couch, arms crossed, and glaring now at the apartment's other occupant. Namely her. 

"Lina, I—" 

"I can not believe you," Lina spat, cutting off all explanation. "I can not believe you would do this to me!" 

Now Slyphiel was starting to get mad. "Do what? I didn't do anything!" 

"Like hell you didn't!" She tried to keep her voice from sounding like whining but in the circumstances, it was impossible. "I saw him first!" 

"But you didn't do anything about it, did you? He certainly didn't seem to think so." 

Lina growled. "Maybe I would have if a certain second-rate model would stop throwing herself at anyone with a thing between their legs and walking." 

"Not fair, Lina. I try hard to find some happiness. Just because your priorities were different, does not make me flighty or slutty in any way." 

Lina bit down on the next retort. She knew that she was being mean. She knew that Slyphiel was right and she knew she was supposed to be an adult about this. But dammit! It just wasn't fair! She glared, until she was just too tired to keep it up. Her shoulders slumped in defeat. "Why him, though?" she asked quietly. "You could have anyone you wanted." 

"But not everyone is a dentist," Slyphiel countered. "And not everyone is that sweet or that generous. Not everyone is Gourry." 

Lina let go a sigh of resignation. "You really like him, huh?" 

"Yes, I'm afraid I do." 

Lina nodded. Then, without a word, she grabbed her coat and headed out the door, leaving Slyphiel alone in the quiet apartment. 

Zelgadis turned off the television when he heard the knocks on the door. He certainly wasn't expecting anyone this late, he thought as he opened the door, let alone a puppet. For that's what first popped in as soon as the door opened enough. The familiar bunny puppet Lina often carried around just for fun poked its head in and waved its stubby arms. "Hey, friend, let's play." He smiled and let Lina in. 

One delivered pepperoni pizza and several beers later, he finally asked what was bothering her. "Wha makesh you tink sometin's bothering me?" Lina asked, the effects of the alcohol clearly showing up in her speech. 

"Call it a hunch," he said. Though his brain was getting a little buzzed, too. Maybe he should stop drinking? Nah. He popped open another can of beer. 

"What is with men anyway?" Lina ranted, a touch too loudly but completely unaware that she was. And Zelgadis wasn't going to stop her either, she'd have to be that loud for him to be able to hear her now. "So nosy, like you care, and then they just UP and go and dump you for your roommate `cuz she's taller and has bigger breasts." 

"You really have this complex thing on your bust size, don't you?" 

"Shut up! What would you know anyway?" 

"I guess nothing. Size has never been an issue for me," he leered. 

Lina tried clumsily to slap him upside the head but missed and didn't seem to care. "You just proved my point. Men are pigs." 

"Sounds like the old Lina again," Zelgadis said, speech clearly slurred by now. 

"They are! They treat you real nice `cuz you're a girl, which is discr'mination in the first place, and they either dump you for `fresh meat' or they forget about stuff like your anniversary or your b-* hic * birthday `n stuff. They're so selfish." 

"And griping about how they're not treating you isn't?" 

"No! You've no right to call me selfish anymore. I just gave up the guy of my dreams so my friend could be with him!" Lina took another swig of beer. Recharged and rarin' to go. "Why do we need relationships to be happy, anyway? Why can't guys and girls just be friends and hang out, like us?" 

Zelgadis put down the next empy beer can and turned heavily towards his companion. "I don't know," he said quietly. "It's been my experience that men and women can't `just be friends'." 

"And why the hell not?" Lina griped taking another long drink. 

"Because," he said, slowly reaching out and to run his fingers through Lina's hair. An electrifying sensation shivered down her spine, and Lina's eyes opened wide. She cautiously set her beer down but could not bring herself to face him. "Because," he continued, languidly, as soothingly as the fingers running gently through her hair over and over again, "there's a certain scent on a woman that the man can't resist." As though to make his point, he slowly brought up a few strands of her hair and inhaled their scent. "The kind of shampoo they use, the perfume they wear, if they wear make-up or not. It's all fascinating to guy." He finally dropped the strands of hair much to her disappointment. 

"And then," he said, lightly stroking her cheek with the back of his fingers, "their skin is so different. It's softer, and makes you want to touch it again and again." The fingers languidly traced their way down the length of her cheek one last time until it reached her chin where they shifted to gently cradle it and turned her face slowly, as though not to alarm her, until she faced him. 

"And the eyes," he whispered. Lina automatically looked into his and found herself mirrored in the clearest sapphire orbs she had ever seen. Why hadn't she ever noticed them before? He was still saying something: "Men drown in those eyes. They're the center of brilliance. They spark with an inner fire that cannot be quenched even with the coldest waters of the Arctic. Their beautiful soul is on display, lost in those enigmatic pools. Pools so deep you could drown in them, and you couldn't care less if you did. 

"And then the lips," he said, rubbing his rough thumb along her lower lip, "it all comes back to there. The most fascinating part of a woman," he said, his face looming closer. "It's where we're drawn to, the heart of everything." And gently, he pressed his lips against hers. Lina felt her arms come up around his neck to hold him there. At that moment, the world could go to hell. All she wanted was this one night. 

Lina woke with a start as soon as the sun streamed its bright beams through the window the next morning. For a minute she thought she could relax and pass it off as an odd dream brought on by drinking, but the fact that she was naked in someone else's bed wasn't a good sign. And seeing Zelgadis still fast asleep next to her only served as confirmation. 

Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. The words pounded against her head in synch with her heartbeat. How could she have let this happen? But that wasn't important right now either. She had to get out of here. Now. 

She started to make for her discarded clothes rumpled into piles on the floor when her bare feet on of the cold morning floor with brought her back to the realization of how exposed she was. Foolishly embarrassed, Lina self-consciously tried to clamp the sheets around herself and get out of bed, but didn't even get five steps in when she realized Zelgadis' prone form anchored down the other end. Desperately looking between the sleeping man (who she could also safely assume was quite as bare as she was) and the few more steps between her clothes, Lina gave up all reason and gave a sharp tug on the sheet. Unfortunately, her companion decided at that moment to shift in his sleep that sent her sprawling across the floor. Lina quickly gathered up her clothes, blushing furiously as she tried to hide her body, and then felt even stupider when she realized that Zelgadis hadn't even woken up. Not that it would've mattered anyway. He obviously saw more of her than modesty allowed. Okay, Lina, no more of that. She hurriedly dressed and couldn't get out of there fast enough. 

Zelgadis jumped up when he heard the office door open and close, and was inexplicably relieved to see Lina standing in the doorway. For moments that seemed like an eternity, heavy silence rested between them in which they could do no more than stare awkwardly at each other. 

Finally, he could stand the silence no longer. Perhaps the most uncomfortable thing he'd ever done, but he mentally kicked himself and told him to be a man and make the first move. "Listen, Lina—" he noted that at his speech, she shifted her weight to her back foot, as though she had been expecting this and was going to be listening to this for a while. Whether that was a good sign or a bad one he had yet to figure out. "Well," he continued, trying to cover up the awkwardness he felt by clearing his throat, "Lina, I'm sorry. It was a mistake. It was stupid, and we were drunk. And even though I know it's not an excuse, I hope you realize under normal circumstances this would never, ever have happened." He paused to take a breath before going on. "And understand that I never intended to make you feel taken advantage of, or violated, or--" 

Lina raised a hand to silence him. She seemed to stew in her silence a few more minutes to gather strength before venturing, "It's all right, Zel. Too much stuff was going on, and I know that under normal circumstances this would have never happened. It's partly my fault, too." 

Zelgadis gave her an expression that didn't quite read relief. "So…we're okay, then?" 

Lina nodded. "I just kinda wanted to hear what you thought about it." 

"Well, to be honest, I was terrified of waking up. And then when you weren't there—I panicked." Lina managed a tiny smile of understanding. "Lina?" 

"Hm?" 

"Does this…make everything okay between us? I mean, it's not going to change anything between us…is it?" 

She sighed. "No, Zel. We're fine. And the less time we dwell on it, the better." 

"Right," he said before joining her at the table. But he couldn't go on before once again pressing. "Lina, are you going to be all right?" 

Lina exhaled exasperatedly. "Yes, Zel! For the last time, we're fine." 

Zelgadis winced at her explosive reaction, but still managed to say, "That's not what I meant." 

Lina put down the pencil and once again fell into silence. But when she looked up, her face wore a tiny genuine smile, though her eyes danced with tears. "I'm fine, Zel," she said softly. "Really. I think…it just wasn't meant to be. If it was really love, true love, I don't think I could have given him up so easily." She gave a choking laugh. "In the end, like so many things in my life, it was just all in my head." 

Zelgadis regarded her deeply and nodded in understanding. Finally, in silence and satisfaction, he turned his attention to the script and work began. 

She knew it was stupid, and she was probably being paranoid, but she couldn't get rid of the tiny shred of doubt that still nagged in the back of her brain. It was that doubt that pushed her into buying it. And it was the self-same doubt that led her to open the package and perform the home pregnancy test later that evening. 

Sitting cold and miserable on the toilet seat, Lina waited anxiously for the little blue line to show up in the little field of view. So far, nothing. Good. That was good, wasn't it? How long was she supposed to wait for the results? It had been two weeks after that night, after all. 

Lina wasn't sure how long she waited in agony for the results, but it must have been a while because Slyphiel rapped on the door and called, "Lina, are you done with the bathroom yet?" while coming in. 

Lina felt the color drain from her face, and felt trapped within Slyphiel's wide gaze, like a deer in headlights. Shitshitshit. Why, oh, why hadn't she locked that damn door? 

Slyphiel was appropriately the very picture of shock. She stood in the door for several minutes, jaw agape, looking at the unmistakable tool in her roommate's hand. Her mouth flapped open and closed like a fish's several times before she managed to sputter, "Lina? Were you…oh, my god…were you raped?" 

"NO!" 

Slyphiel's face relaxed visibly. "Oh…Then what is that for?" she asked, pointedly gesturing to the device in Lina's hand. 

Lina's face was as red as a beet. "Oh! This? Um, this is, er, for research! Yeah, research." She punctuated with a nod. Please oh please let her buy it. 

Fortunately Slyphiel apparently decided not to pursue it. "Well," she said instead, "dinner's ready whenever you are." 

"Sure, I'll be right out." Then before following Slyphiel out, she tossed the plastic applicator into the trashcan without a backwards glance. 

Late the following night, Lina found herself glancing at her watch while waiting for the bus. She had loaned her car to Slyphiel to use on her big night on the town with Gourry as a goodwill gesture, but had also managed to leave the station just at a time when it was iffy whether she could catch the last bus home or not. Gods, she hoped the bus hadn't come on time. Or early. Please, please be late. 

But while she was impatiently glancing up the street for any signs of the bus, she heard a brusque voice coming from the other direction: "Hey, you!" 

Lina turned around and came face to face with a short, fat and very disgruntled man. Once he caught Lina's attention, he smirked, but without satisfaction. "I knew it was you," he spat. "The tail is a dead give away." 

Lina eyed him incredulously. She didn't think she knew him. "Tail?" 

The man smirked again, "Yeah, you bitch." Lina didn't even try to hide looking offended, which this time did seem to please the man. "The tail of that cur the high and might Lina Inverse who's too bitter that she's not getting any so she bashes those who can on the radio." 

"Now, listen here, you—" 

"No, YOU listen here, you goddamn cunt!" The man quickly and purposefully closed the distance between them and, before Lina could react, grabbed her around the collar and with seemingly inhuman fury, lifted her inches off the ground. The wild terror in Lina's eyes was unmistakable while she gasped for breath, the anger in this man's eyes was truly frightening, and the man laughed maliciously in genuine satisfaction. Lina tried to look around and call for help, but she was short of breath and the man forced her head back forward. "No, bitch. Look at me when I'm talking of you! I'm getting divorced because of your phony dribble! My wife is leaving me! And it's all your fault!" he screamed giving her a violent shake. 

Just when Lina felt like she was going to pass out, she saw a blur pass between them and she felt the man's grip loosen, while both she and the man fell to the ground. Lina coughed a few times and tried rubbing the feeling back into her throat when she felt someone gently place their hand on her back for support and rub soothingly to calm her down. Quickly she looked up and met Zelgadis' concerned eyes. "Are you okay?" he asked. 

Lina managed to nod, but could not yet manage to talk. Wordlessly and still coughing, she looked past him at her assaulter who was now picking himself up but still rubbing his sore jaw, already swelling with a nasty bruise. The man glared daggers at them, which Zelgadis stood and met back. 

"Get out of here," Zelgadis growled, "before I call the cops." 

The man spat in his direction but turned to leave. "You'll hear from my lawyer." 

"And you'll hear from ours, you sonuvabitch." Zelgadis didn't break his taunt stance until the man's form disappeared into the night. As soon as he disappeared, he hurried back to Lina's side and checked over for injuries. "You're bleeding." 

Lina barely spared a glance for her banged up legs. Mostly she felt shaken up, but otherwise fine with the exception of her throat, of course. She started laughing hoarsely. "Just one of my fans," she croaked not without a bite of bitterness. 

"Come on. I'll give you a ride home." Gently so as not to startle her, he slid one arm behind her knees and encircled one behind her back and lifted her into his arms. The instinctive protests started to rise to her lips. She wasn't a cripple dammit! She could walk. But she just felt so tired of it all, and slumped against Zelgadis' warm chest, letting his steady heartbeat lull her to sleep. 

Slyphiel was worried when she came home and there was no one there. She was even more worried when the clock struck 2 in the morning and Lina hadn't even called. 

On her second cup of coffee, she heard the doorbell ring. She immediately answered and was shocked to see Zelgadis, Lina's producer, with the unconscious girl in his arms. Wordlessly, Zelgadis stepped past her and entered the apartment, setting her down on the couch. 

"What happened to her?" Slyphiel demanded when she returned with the disinfectant and bandages. 

Zelgadis tried to shush her, but Lina already started to stir and slowly opened her eyes. She gave a goofy smile. "Hi, Slyph." 

Her roommate was not amused. "Honestly, Lina! What is with you these days?" she fussed while Zelgadis started to bandage Lina's injuries. "Staying out late, coming back bleeding, taking pregnancy tests for research…" 

Lina felt Zelgadis stiffen. She chanced a glance at him and saw his hands had stopped in midair, bandage half wrapped. Perhaps he didn't find the courage to meet her eyes because he didn't look up but kept his gaze trained downward. Eventually, he finished the job and slowly stood. 

Lina tried flexing her knee and smiled. "Thanks, Zel." 

"I'll be going now," he said quietly. "See me to the door?" 

"Sure…" 

Lina wrapped her arms around herself to protect from the cold night air. Zelgadis was strangely silent as the made their slow way to his car. Once standing outside the car, however, he made no move to get in. 

Lina decided if someone was going to break the silence, it'd have to be her. "Well," she said, "thanks for everything, Zel." 

But he didn't appear to hear her. "Lina…let's get married." 

Lina blinked. "What?" 

He looked uncomfortable. "You heard me." 

She gave him a look of utter perplexity. "If this is about the pregnancy test, don't bother. I'm not pregnant." 

He slowly shook his head. "It's not just that…I've been thinking about this for a long time now. I think we'd be good for each other." 

Lina smiled, this time with understanding. "Zel…" She went up to him and he suddenly found himself wrapped in her warm embrace. When she pulled away, the same understanding smile was still in place. "Did you feel anything from that?" Zelgadis didn't respond. He just stared at her. She shook her head. "I didn't think so. Zel, ask that question to someone who makes you feel something when they do that. Okay? Take care now. I'll see you at work." 

On the day of Lina's birthday, the birthday girl was up bright and early whistling as she bustled about the kitchen. She wanted to celebrate this day exactly right. After all, who knew when these days would end? She heard Slyphiel stir and enter the room, fully dressed in an elegant pantsuit. 

"Morning, Slyph! Have some breakfast." 

"Oh, no thanks, Lina. I've got to run. Gourry should be here any minute. Oh, and just so you know, I'll probably be in late today, so don't wait up," she said as she headed out the door. 

Lina watched the door slam close. Then she added the last three eggs to the frying pan anyway. 

Lina smiled at the small bag of foil wrapped chocolates that awaited her on her desk. The card attached read: "Hugs and Kisses on your birthday—Zelgadis." Cheerfully, she popped one into her mouth. 

"Thank you, Zel," she sang when he came in for the day and took his place next to her. 

Zelgadis shrugged it off and turned his attention to the script. And the team dutifully went through the next show, all the while Zelgadis tried to keep the look of nervousness off his face as his hand kept fingering his pocket. 

"Zel?" 

"What?" He jumped a bit. 

"You looked like you were spacing out. Is something wrong?" 

He fidgeted uncomfortably. "No." Lina sighed and gave him a look. "All right," he sighed. "I'm just nervous, that's all." 

"Nervous? Why?" He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny box. Inside displayed a simple gold band bearing a large diamond. "Zel, you're not—" 

"I've never done something like this before." 

"Well, when were you going to tell her? I'll give you my professional opinion." 

He smirked in amusement. "As a woman." 

"Bingo." 

He shrugged and ran a hand through his hair. Well, I guess it couldn't hurt. "We've got reservations at Chez Panisse tonight. I was going to ask her there." 

Lina smiled encouragingly. "It'll be fine, trust me. You've been dating for what now…almost a year?" 

"Yeah," he sighed. He still was nervous. But he decided to push that to the back of his mind and return to the task at hand. 

After work, Lina found herself alone. Pathetic, utterly pathetic. She decided to walk home. That way she could see the leaves changing color in all the superb display that was autumn. 

The main boulevard was lined with skinny maples, all different shades in different ways. Lina smiled wistfully as she pulled her coat around herself tighter. The fallen leaves swirled at her feet, as though asking her to dance with them. Lina shook her head. Maybe she was supposed to be alone. Her birthday, and her closest friends all had abandoned her for their more important lives. And she couldn't even bring herself to begrudge them. It was inevitable. 

On the way, she saw a karaoke bar. She shrugged. What the hell? And went in. 

She was lead to a large room with the standard machine and a couple of couches and two microphones on the low table. Lina picked one up. After flipping through the beat up binder with the song lists, she entered the code into the machine and waited until the garbled electronic instrumentals came from the speakers and the words appeared on the bottom of the screen of a horribly inappropriate makeshift music video. She lifted the microphone, and her lovely lone voice echoed back to her: 

Whenever I sang my songs 

On the stage, on my own 

Whenever I said my words 

Wishing they would be heard 

I saw you smiling at me 

Was it real or just my fantasy? 

You'd always be there in the corner 

Of this tiny little bar 

My last night here for you 

Same old songs, just once more 

My last night here with you? 

Maybe yes, maybe no 

I kind of liked it your way 

How you shyly placed your eyes on me 

Did you ever know 

That I had mine on you? 

Darling, so there you are 

With that look on your face 

As if you're never hurt 

As if you're never down 

Shall I be the one for you 

Who pinches you softly but sure 

If frown is shown then 

I will know that you are no dreamer 

So let me come to you 

Close as I want to be 

Close enough for me 

To feel your heart beating fast 

And stay there as I whisper 

How I love your peaceful eyes on me 

Did you ever know 

That I had mine on you? 

Darling, so share with me 

Your love if you have enough 

Your tears if you're holding back 

Or pain if that's what it is 

How can I let you know 

I'm more than the dress and the voice 

Just reach me out then 

You will know that you're not dreaming 

Darling, so there you are 

With that look on your face 

As if you're never hurt 

As if you're never down 

Shall I be the one for you 

Who pinches you softly but sure 

If frown is shown then I will know 

that you are no dreamer 

She let the last line fade away with the rest of the song until she was left with the hollow echoes the music had barely managed to cover up in the first place. Then silence. Sighing, Lina flipped through and decided on another song. 

"Mr. Zelgadis? Is there something wrong?" Amelia's luminous eyes conveyed every possible worry that she felt for her dinner companion. Her boyfriend had been jumpy all evening, and she had a vague feeling as to why. 

Zelgadis winced as he heard his girlfriend address him. You'd think that after all this time, she'd stop calling him "Mister." 

He fingered the outline of the box within his jacket pocket. Then he stared across the table into Amelia's lovely face. Her face was luminous in the full blooming blossom of youth. The soft lightening added to the feminine features, and the candlelight shone in her large eyes. And in that moment, Zelgadis swallowed and took a deep breath, all the while finger the box, and said, "Amelia…we need to talk…" 

Lina didn't continue on her journey home until after the sun had gone down. Her steps were now slow and measured. She wanted to think about this year; she was, after all, another year older. 

She looked up to see her reflection in a window, and then past the reflection to the cheery cakes on display. She sighed. Maybe she should get one. She could just eat it tomorrow when Slyphiel had time. But even she knew how pathetic that was. She was truly alone. 

Or maybe not. Lina started as a colored blur appeared in the window next to her. She quickly turned and found a large colorful bouquet of balloons, hovering in the air, weighed down by a tiny weight that managed to bob up and down just at eye level. Lina reached out to it, and upon closer inspection saw that it was attached to a tiny familiar box. Taking it in her hand, she glanced around. She knew he was here. 

And sure enough, there he was, standing not even ten feet away, hands in his pockets, grinning. Lina had to grin back. 

"Zel? What are you doing here?" 

"It's your birthday. You shouldn't spend it alone." 

"What about Amelia?" 

He merely shrugged. "We called it an early night." 

"But what about…?" she gestured to the tiny box she held in her fist. 

He shook his head. "I couldn't," he said softly. 

Lina frowned sympathetically. "Oh, Zel. You should have more confidence." 

"No, it's not that." He slowly made his way over to her until they were standing face to face. Then, gently, he pulled her into his embrace. She was too stunned to say anything. 

"Lina," he said softly. It was his voice, so warm, so gentle, in her ear that brought her back to reality. "Lina, do you remember what you asked me? On a night not so long ago when we were standing as we are now?" Dumbly, she nodded. "Do you remember what you asked me?" 

"Yes," she whispered. 

"Do you remember what I said?" 

Again she nodded. "We agreed we felt nothing." 

"No, I didn't say a word. I was too shocked. I couldn't think properly. And it was just all…wrong. But, Lina, can you honestly tell me you don't feel anything now?" 

Yes would have been the easier answer to give. She knew what no meant, and yes would be the answer she had to give. Only…it wouldn't be true. It hadn't been true for a long time now. And on some level, she supposed something in her always knew. 

Her silence gave Zelgadis enough encouragement to continue. "Lina, it's not Amelia. She's not The One. I think on some level I always knew that. But I wasn't sure until tonight. I thought I was ready to give her the ring. But I couldn't. Whenever I thought I was ready to give it to her, my hands wouldn't move and the words wouldn't come out. 

"But I knew I bought the ring because I was ready to give it to someone." He gently took the box enclosed in Lina's fist and opened it, extracting its contents and holding it up to the light so the diamond sparkled brightly. With his other hand, he gently took Lina's left and slid the ring onto her finger. She watched with unabashed shock. He smiled. "See how easy that was?" 

Of all the reactions, tears were not what Zelgadis was expecting to see. But nevertheless, Lina's ruby eyes glistened with them, seeming to add another facet to their brilliance, which Zelgadis found utterly breathtaking. "Lina…?" 

But Lina silenced him with a wave of her hand, bidding him to be silent. The other she held to her mouth, trying to stop the choking sobs from spilling out. "If this is some kind of joke of yours, Zelgadis Graywords, I'm gonna kill you." 

"Lina, I've never been more serious in my life." By now the tears were coursing freely down Lina's cheeks. Zelgadis gently brushed them away. "No tears, not even happy ones," he whispered. Such emotion was reserved for other occasions. "Only smiles, because today is your birthday." He took her hand. "Come on, let's go back to your place and celebrate." 

In the dark of her apartment, over the glow of the candles in the cake on the dining table, Lina drank in the sight of Zelgadis' smile. He raised his glass of champagne and proposed a toast: "To the incredible lady that is Lina Inverse and to the first of many happy birthdays we'll share together." 

Lina sipped appreciatively at the toast. Then countered with a toast of her own: "To the Hundredth Man." And then giggled at the confusion that flitted across Zelgadis' features, but wholeheartedly took the obligatory sip without bothering to explain herself and instead indulged in a secretive smile. 

Zelgadis had no idea what Lina just meant. But, he thought as he drank to it, the smile that lit up her face was enough to satisfy him. 

Author's Note: The song is "Eyes On Me" from the Final Fantasy VIII soundtrack. Melancholy and sweet, it seemed to fit. 

This fic is dedicated to T-chan, Chaos-chan (my best reader!), and everyone who made the Tea Garden a fun place to be. Thanks for one great year! 

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